When life hands you lemons...

Sometimes life doesn't go as planned. Out of the blue it can throw you a pile of sour lemons that hit you fair and square between the eyes. Leaving you feeling dazed, confused and totally off kilter.

Like most Mammas I have many balls in the air. Juggling bills, work, that endless to do list and a good dose of guilt like a cirque du soleil pro.  But inevitably my lack of coordination appears, a curve ball or two hits and it all comes crashing down. It's been a pretty crappy few weeks for Burnsy and I punctuated with very little sleep. Its fair to say that I have not been on top of my game. But you know what? Today I am ok with that.  

Its another 5am saturday morning wake up. But instead of lamenting the hour I have spent the morning silently stalking my friends on Facebook, reading my favourite blogs and listening to those familiar and comforting early morning sounds of the Inner West. Chirping birds, light traffic, Santo watering his cabbages next door and of course Burnsie snoring. 

I finally feel calm and relaxed. Not sure if that's the residual panadol in my blood stream or the fact that my little munchkin is not here pulling me out of bed to watch cartoons and make her some breakfast!

Ava has been with her Nanny for a few days. Its the longest period I have ever been away from her, I have missed her like crazy and a I can't wait to see her today. But it's also reminded me that taking time out for myself is the best thing I can do for my family. A cranky, run down and overtired Mamma is not a very fun Mamma - that's for sure.

Now weeks like these need not come by again any time too soon, that's for sure! But without the sour, you can never truly appreciate the sweetness in life! 

So it's what you do with those lemons that make all the difference!! Personally I like to squeeze them onto pancakes or juice them with apples, celery, kale and ginger - so yummy! 

What gets you back on track when things don't go to plan?

Croatian vegie stuffed capsicum

A big thank you to SJ, the culinary genius from Chasing the Donkey, who inspired this recipe. Get the original stuffed peppers recipe here and follow SJ's blog if you love food and travel or need a laugh.

After seeing SJs meat filled version on Instagram my mouth wouldn't stop watering for days, which is unusual as I do not eat beef. But I'm always looking for new ways to cook vegetables, so I thought I'd rework this into a vegetarian winter warmer for meatless Monday. Plus I wanted to use up the vegies that were piling up in our fridge and some herbs from our garden. This is really one of those meals where you can just throw together whatever you have on hand.

So Monday comes along and as usual I am super organised, haha yeah right! When I bothered to read the recipe properly (on MONDAY night) I realise it's going to take two hours to cook. Crap! Now that we have a child, eating at 10pm on a school night just isn't an option. So unfortunatly we didn't get to make this for Meatless Monday, it was bumped to Wednesday because that's my day off with Ava and clearly I have heaps of free time on Wednesdays. 

There are a few steps in this recipe - stuffing the capsicum, making the sauce then cooking it for two hours. So SJ's two hours would equal minimum three hours for me. And in addition to cooking and prep time I needed to prepare myself mentally...  

As a general rule I like to make things that are quick and simple. Minimal instructions and zero technique, anything more and I end up rocking in the corner. However I am known to occasionally overextend myself (in time and ability) and this was worth the anxiety and the effort. 

Once Ava was tucked up for her afternoon nap I was ready for battle the challenge. I read the instructions multiple times and reminded myself to breath. 

Ingredients

Stuffed Capsicums:
6 capsicums

2 small carrots diced

2 celery stalks diced 

2 zucchinis diced

2 tomatoes diced

1 tsp Garlic 

1 cup Brown rice
1 free range egg

1 tsp Paprika (optional)

Sauce:

1 Celery stalk

1 Carrot

1 tbs GF Flour

2 tbs tomato paste

2 cups vegetable stock

Salt & pepper

Bay leaf
Mixed herbs (optional)

Instructions

Start with the stuffing:

• Carefully slice the top off the capsicums and scrape out all the seeds
• Wash and set aside - don't forget to keep the lids
• Chop up the vegies and mix together in a bowl
• Mix in rice, paprika and garlic
• Season with salt and pepper 
• Spoon mix into capsicums, don't overfill them as they will explode (like mine did)
• Place capsicums into a large pot keeping them close so they don't fall over, but not too squashed as they will fall appart like mine did 
• Set aside to make sauce.

Make your sauce:

• Throw celery and carrot in a pan. 
• You can add onion, however onion and my sensitive belly don't get along so I left it out.  
• Once the vegies have softened add flour (I use GF) and mix well until browned 
• Add tomato paste, stock and and herbs
• Stir well until sauce boils 
• Pour sauce evenly over the capsicums, making sure they are fully covered
• Put the lids on the capsicums. 

Cook for 2 hours:

• Cook on a low heat for 2 hours
• Check the pot and shake regularly to ensure the sauce is evenly spread so you don't burn them 
• Add extra stock, water or a can of diced tomatos if you need more liquid - don't let it dry out or the capsicums will burn and fall apart
• Allow to sit for a while after cooking - like any good sauce the flavours will intensify
• Serve with mashed potato or rice. 

Initially the multiple steps had me terrified, however I found the process to be more time consuming than difficult. And this is one of those meals you can just throw together whatever you have on hand. Perfect for someone like me who struggles with too many instructions and never remembers to bring a shopping list to the shops. 

The aroma that filled the house was amazing, resulting in the inevitable over indulgence where appropriate portion size is thrown out the window.  And best of all, Ava loved it! Like all new things she did not want to try it at first, but after some gentle persuasion and possibly a little bribery she polished off the lot!  Winning!

What's your favourite winter warmer meal?

Your bandaid is where?

For a once free spirited drifter, it amazes me how much I love routine these days. I rely on routine to keep me focused and to get things done. Without goals and routine you would probably find me curled up in a corner rocking.  

Night time routines are especially critical at the Burnsie residence. Ava's bedtime routine involves two or three stories,  a selection of teddies and babies to be tucked in and Ava's choice of one parent remaining for snuggles "under the covers".  "You wanna come under covers with me Mamma?" How can that offer be refused??? 

Of course bedtime routine also comes with a plethora of stalling tactics! Ranging from the timeless, "I'm thirsty, I need a drink" to "I need to go to the toilet", the former is now mitigated by strategically placed water bottles. Ava's current favourite is "my tummy hurts, I want some Spider-Man C" (that's actually vitamin C - obviously) and then there was the cryptic "where"s my talice?" It took days and countless meltdowns  to figure out her talice was the remote control to the mobile we had over her cot when she was a baby. Ok then.....

I love our routine for my nights under the covers, I hear all about Ava's friends at day care, she tells me about her favourite games and we make up silly stories. Brett loves his nights under the covers because in addition to snuggling up with his little princess in a bed half his size, he often falls asleep before Ava. And as an added bonus he avoids cleaning the kitchen. 

Last night's bedtime routine was no exception. It was late, 2 stories were negotiated, the night's stalling tactic involved a sore finger and Dora bandaid to make it all better.  Then Daddy was instructed to climb under the covers.

After 30 minutes I thought I better go in to wake up Burnsie. Any longer and ill be stuck cleaning the  kitchen on my own and he will need a physio from falling asleep in a 1.5 metre bed. 

Before I managed to drag myself away from the heater I heard a wail. Oh  dear, had Burnsie just rolled on Ava? No way, not enough room to breath, let alone roll in that bed. 

My bandaid my bandaid wailed Ava running out to me. "Ummm i think her bandaide is up her nose", says Burnsie way too calmly. WTF? 

Ava had somehow managed to shove her Dora bandaid up her nose!!! I silently and momentarily freaked out while envisioning an xray of Dora's face grinning at me, firmly lodged in the frontal lobe of her brain. 

Brett was still half asleep but in action mode.  Ava was pretty distressed and wanted to go to the doctors. Holding her close, I was strangely calm and composed. Brett who is always calm and knows what to do in an emergency, asked her to blow her nose a few times. After what felt like an eternity and with a lot of gentle persuasion she blew her nose. Luckily it appeared and I was able to pull it out.

What an ordeal! I just wanted to hold my baby girl all night and tell her it was ok. Bless the little angel, she said she was sorry for putting Dora up her nose. But after 2 minutes she had moved on and wanted to tell me about her new alligator story. 

Even though I was totally freaked out, I was very proud of myself for not completely losing my shit. But regardless, I don't ever want to have to go through that again!!! 

You should bow to me Mamma

Wait, what?? My daughter said "You should bow to me Mamma" and she was quite serious. So I did.

I was kind of taken aback by this one, I mean kids say the weirdest funniest things right? But where the hell did this come from? I was like, what? Can you please tell Mamma again sweetheart, I don't think I heard right. So she said it again. And like a good Mum I bowed to her then asked her to bow to me, which she did with a giggle.

Quite frankly Ava Mae rules over this household, Burnsie and I practically bow to her every day metaphorically speaking.  Her attitude and spunk make her irresistible and likely to get away with murder.

Don't get me wrong, we do practice discipline however when little miss attitude gives out some 'quick witted, intelligent and in context' lip, it makes me burst with pride and adoration. Is that wrong? The girl has an answer for everything and will not back down if she has something to say. Whilst if frustrates the hell out of me it also makes me incredible proud that I am raising a strong, smart, passionate and fiercely independent female. 

In my head I often hear the voice of my own Mum saying "karma"!! But for now I choose to ignore the fact that a cute and feisty toddler attitude will likely develop into a serious angsty teenage attitude - oh good grief!! For now I'm happy to ride the wave of cuteness and punch out a few entertaining status updates for family and friends. 

What to do with a 2 year old with all this rain?

What to do with a 2 year old when the rain keeps pouring down and there's no sign of any reprieve?  Simple, grab your umbrella, put on a raincoat and gum boots and get out there!

Miss Ava Mae is completely obsessed with Peppa Pig. And anyone familiar with Peppa Pig will know that Peppa's favourite pastime is jumping in muddy puddles. So when the rain hit this weekend we decided if you can't beat them, join them!!

Little kids truly live in the present, something we should all try to do every now and then. The pure joy on Ava's face as she splashed muddy water everywhere, including all over me, was priceless.  I have to admit, I really enjoyed jumping up and down in the filthy water. After last week's heat, the rain and cooler weather was quite refreshing.

And in saying that, we are lucky that the rain here is enough to be annoying but has not caused havoc like it has in far Norther NSW and Queensland. My heart goes out to the many people affected and we will be doing our bit by donating to the Red Cross Flood appeal.

What do you do to keep the kids entertained when the weather turns to crap? 

Poos and tanties. A day of firsts for the darling Ava Mae!

I'm a proud Mum, with another day marking a couple of major firsts in Ava's toddler years!

Today Ava did her first poo in the potty! Very exciting, until she tried to pick it up... Yes charming I know, you should have seen Burnsie's face! But these are the things that can make your day (almost) as much as a new pair of Jimmy Choos when you are a new mamma!!

And the other first? Ava had her first full blown tanty at the shops. She has plenty at home, believe me! But this was her first major tanty in the middle of The Metro. It was your full scale, back arching, ear piercing, blood curdling, floor kicking tanty.

I should have seen the signs early on. She chanted Elmo, Elmo, Elmo through K-mart; I said "No sweetheart, you can watch Elmo on tv". Then she wanted the green bananas we got in Aldi; again I said "No sweetheart, they are not ripe. Here, have a sayo." Then she wanted a balloon from the kitchen salesman; finally I said "Yes have a balloon my darling, please!!" Amazing that she hadn't lost it before this point really!

Finally it was the Wiggles big red car ride that pushed us over the edge. She wanted to get in and I let her. Then, when it was time to go all hell broke loose. Ava let out a blood curdling scream, like I had just ripped her heart out.

It was amazing to watch the number of young males who had previously been lounging about, suddenly leg it towards the exit. I got pity stares from fellow parents and judging sideways glares from young hipsters who had never dealt with a strong willed toddler before.

I freaked out a little and tried to comfort her whilst shoving her dummy in her mouth, knowing full well that was not going to work. So like the doting mother I am at home, I put her down on the floor and ignored her until she settled down so we could walk back to the car. I then let her push all the buttons in the lift and let her think she was the one pushing the trolly.

In reality, Ava allowed me to believe that I was the one in control. HAHA!

Just baked these Donna Hay Brownie Cookies with Peanut Butter Frosting, sooooo indulgent!!

Ok, these Donna Hay cookies have to be the richest, most decadent cookies I have ever made or even tasted.

Not quite a cookie, not quite a brownie they are a calorific mind bender, and are loaded with enough chocolate to power Willy Wonker's factory for a year.

I saw them on Life Styled a couple of weeks ago and have been obsessed by them ever since.

I'm taking a batch of these to work for our team morning tea on Monday, this was the practice run. They were a bit on the runny side, so were way too big and flat but I'm still pretty happy with them!

Brownie cookies with peanut butter frosting

• 350g dark chocolate, chopped
• 40g butter
• 2 eggs
• ⅔ cup (150g) caster sugar
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• ¼ cup (35g) gluten free plain flour, sifted
• ¼ teaspoon baking powder, sifted 

Peanut butter frosting 

• 1 cup (160g) icing sugar mixture 
• 1 cup (280g) smooth peanut butter 
• 80g butter 
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 
• ⅓ cup (80ml) single cream (I used milk)

Preheat oven to 180°C (350°F). Place 200g of the chocolate and the butter in a small saucepan over low heat and stir until melted and smooth. Set aside. Place the eggs, sugar and vanilla in the bowl of an electric mixer and whisk for 15 minutes or until pale and creamy. Stir through the flour, baking powder, chocolate mixture and remaining chocolate and allow to stand for 10 minutes. Spoon tablespoonfuls of the mixture, at a time, onto baking trays lined with non-stick baking paper. Bake for 8–10 minutes or until puffed and cracked. Allow to cool completely on trays.

To make the peanut butter frosting, place the sugar, peanut butter, butter and vanilla in an electric mixer and beat for 6 minutes or until light and fluffy. Add the cream and beat for a further 2 minutes. Spread half the cookies with the peanut butter frosting and sandwich with the remaining cookies. Makes 12.

Mamma on another mission!

Many of you know that we often take our other baby Chewy to the park to run off his energy and experience a bit of grass and socialisation with other dogs. Our local park is Henson Park, it's been frequented by dogs and their owners for many years!

Recently the council decided they would start dishing out fines to people whose dogs were not on leads. With no official dog parks in Marrickville, this is quite an issue for the local dog owner community who live in this great concrete jungle within the inner west!

Hence, I am writing to the council and local government and I've created a Facebook page to request that Henson Park be appointed an official off-leash dog park.

Please show your support by joining our Facebook page Please help make Henson Park an off-leash dog park and sending your feedback to council on their Have your say page at marrickville.nsw.gov.au.

Note to self

It is incredibly unwise to give a pen to a toddler in exchange for 2 minutes on the computer. In my defence, it had a lid on when I gave it to her, and it seemed like an easy distraction.

I only had one quick email to send, and I couldn't even tell you who it was for, what it was about or why it seemed so important at the time...

I simply and quite selfishly wanted the keyboard all to myself so I could send a message, not have lines of garble bashed out on the keyboard.

Hence my darling daughter repaid the favour with a lovely scrawl on our antique white kitchen wall. Luckily she did it so hard you can barley see the blue ink, but the indent into the paint should last a while!!

I think we have a little artist in our midst! Does anyone else have their very own personalised wall art?

Mamma's review of The Fat Paddler

I have just finished reading The Fat Paddler and am feeling inspired to tackle life's challenges head on!

Whether you are into paddling or not, you will relate to The Fat Paddler's story. As a Mum I understand how it feels to know that you would do anything for the sake of your children. And Sean's commitment to turning his life around, despite seemingly insurmountable obstacles is truly inspirational, heartfelt and honest.

As memoirs go, The Fat Paddler is an easy read. It's funny, conversational, reflective and brutally honest. Yet it was also a hard read for me. Knowing Sean well and knowing the incredible hurdles he has overcome I appreciate even more what a tough journey he has had and all with a constant smile on his chubby face.

My favourite quote, "...moments like these mean the most. Moments of true unadulterated beauty. Moments where you find yourself. Moments of Peace." Yes this is what confronting life's challenges and committing to living are all about. Thanks for sharing big guy x

Now mind you, reading Sean's inspiring tale was not without some of my own (first world) challenges... The rugby noise emitting from the TV was annoying; I was interrupted a number of times by a distraught, teething toddler; then after a glass or 2 of wine my bladder decided I should get up every 20 minutes! However I finally managed some rare quiet time this afternoon while both babies (Burnsie too) slept.

So if you are familiar with first world problems like mine or have truly been up against it like Sean, I can highly recommend The Fat Paddler. You can pre-order a copy online or follow Sean's adventures at FatPaddler.com.

Some more adult reading

Read by my fave Play School presenter from when I was a kid, Noni Hazelhurst. This book "Go The Fuck To Sleep" has been a bit of a hit in some Mum's Groups.


Go the Fuck to Sleep - read by Noni Hazlehurst from Text Publishing on Vimeo.

A Mamma's mission

I love Wednesday's at home with Ava. It's my favourite day of the week where just us girls get to hang out and do fun stuff like go to the park, play dolls and dress up, go to the library and catch up with friends etc. And every now and then I stumble across an activity and think, RIGHT that's what we are doing this Wednesday, Ava will LOVE it!!

Sooooo the other day I was driving through Tempe and passed a circus. There were lions pacing up and down a large cage plus camels, ponies etc all on display.

My first reaction? Sadness. I was particularly sad for the lions that have been bred into circus life, sad they have never experienced the freedom of the African savannah, sad they were bred into a life of performing rather than ruling the land. My second thought? Conflicted! How Ava would love to see lions. She is so fascinated and excited by animals! You should hear her squeal when she sees dogs on the dog food bags at the pet supplies store...

I wrestled with it for a couple of days and decided that whilst I was against performing circus animals I would take Ava to look at them between performances. I was doing it for her right? She would thank me for it one day right? Sadly, we are not going on safari anytime soon, so the circus it would be to see her first wild animal.

So off we headed on Wednesday afternoon. We'd already had a big morning at Bondi junction and Ava had refused to sleep when I put her down for a nap after lunch. Heading there in early peak hour traffic Ava naturally fell into a deep sleep. But I soldiered on, as there was no turning back now right?

We arrived at a nearby park. I put her in the stroller still fast asleep and pushed her to the lion's cage. I am always in awe of lions, their magnificent manes and that imposing strut! I wanted Ava to experience their presence so badly but she was out to the count! I even lifted her out of the pram and whispered, the lions go roar bubba. Mummy loves lions and I hope you get to see them in the wild when you are bigger. But Ava slept, in fact she snored her way through it. SNORED even as we went cross country to see them!!

Talk about a mamma on a mission! As parents how often do we compromise our own beliefs for our children?